wee christmas laugh

[Heelandcoo]

Three men died on Christmas Eve in Weston and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season" Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."



The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle", he said.



"You may pass through the pearly gates" Saint Peter said.



The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells."



Saint Peter said "You may pass through the pearly gates".





The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked,"And just what do those symbolize?



The man replied," "These are Carols."

[Satman]

lol.....liked that one Angel

[Heelandcoo]

A lady was driving down the street in a sweat because
she had an important meeting and couldn't find a
parking place.

Looking up toward heaven, she said,

"Lord, take pity on me.

If you find me a parking place, I will go to Mass every Sunday
for the rest of my life and give up sex and vodka."

Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

She looked up again and said,

"Never mind. I found one."